"I am the man." FFW (II.ii.25)

Viola is speaking to herself after her encounter with Malvolio and him returning the ring to him that Orsino had not given Olivia. Viola says "I am the man." meaning that she is the man that Olivia loves not Orsino. Orsino never gave her a ring, she set this all up just for me to come back to her. If this is true which she says it is, it is going to be sad for her since, she is not a he. It will be sad for her. Olivia has no interest in Orsino at all Viola is the man of Olivia's desires!!!!

"...and yet to crush it a little,..." FFW (II.v.143-145)

Malvolio says "...yet to crush it a little, it would bow to me..." he is reading the note that he believes is written by Olivia and he thinks that it is telling him that she loves him. A secret note for him to decipher. As he reads some random alphabet letters he wishes them to mean a code that refers to himself. Malvolio will twist anything into them to make it fit into his puzzle. Malvolio sees what he wants to see even if it doesn't make sense.

"Then Think you right" FFW (III.i.148-9)

Viola says "Then think you right." "I am not what I am." which we know to mean that she is a woman and not a man so she is hinting to Olivia. Olivia's response is interesting "I would you were as I would have you be" because Olivia wants him to be what she wants him to be, she is falling in love with him but she would like him to be what she is dreaming of. Olivia wants a man who is more of nobility not someone who works for someone else. In the next line Viola says that right now he is a big fool. He feels that it would be better to be what Olivia wants him to be rather then what he is. They are both playing off of each other but Viola knows that it can never be what Olivia is dreaming of, Olivia is not aware of the deception before her.

Focused Free Write "Sport Royal"

In Act II scene 3 line 179 Maria calls her scheme to manipulate and embarass Malvolio "Sport Royal..." What I make of this is that Maria is going to use the upperclass, the royal postition to use as a pawn in a sort of sporting game against Mavolio. Maria plans on using Olivia's status to tease and make fool of him but dangling her royal status in front of him as a something he wants to grab and uptain to, and since others are involved and are sort of acting like spectators it has become a game or sport.

Inkshedding on Twelfth Night Act II

"Nay, by my troth, I know not. But I know to be up late is to be up late" Act 2 Scene 3 line 4-5 from the Twelfth Night by William Shakespeare, what does Sir Andrew mean by it? As a personal reflection and taking into account the comments of my fellow students in the inkshedding exercise, I feel that we all agree that Sir Andrew does seem to have his own logic and it is not agreeable with Sir Toby Belch's logic or what the doctors say is healthy about getting up early in the morning. To Sir Andrew he believes that staying up late is just that, staying up late, whereas Sir Toby Belch believes that is early morning. Sir Andrew does not care nor does he pay any attention to what the conquences may be, he only wishes to be drink booze and eat food, going to bed late, is simply going to bed late, he knows not of its health benefit.

Metacommentary on Writing Paper 1

For me, writing the small object/large subject essay was a test of my confidence in my writing and I felt slightly nervous. In my previous writing class, we were given different direction and the content was worded differently so I was unsure if I met all the requirements. I find my writing to be a dialoque but in class we learned that it really shouldn't so I hope I that I hit the target. I am working on my inner self as a older freshman re-entering the college campus trying to catch-up on years gone by, whereas I have more experience in life and it does reflect in my writing. I found that the fact that we got to choose what we wanted to write about was comforting for me and also the fact that I got to choose technology, which I have experience and passion within. The subject made it easier to write about, however the details and the flow made me a bit nervous. I also never had to write a cite page before so I had to research how to do it, plus how to insert them into the essay. I feel that I understand what to do, I am just taking baby steps to get there. I am enjoying my new found love for writing and I am hoping that it comes across in my writing.

After reading Act 1 of Twelfth Night...

I can't stop thinking about how the language used by Shakespeare is so confusing. I feel like I should understand it better, but still find myself looking to the notes to help me along with it. The characters themselves and the plot could be a modern soap opera or a reality show in the making. I feel that it has been a rough start and I am hoping that from all the jumping around and difficult language it gets clearer and more interesting. I am also wondering about how the title will fit into the play, what is the going to happen on the Twelfth Night? I am sure that one of the characters may meet with a most certain and untimely death as in most of Shakespeare's writing, I am thinking could it be the fool? Ah the fool, why do we not have fools of our own, walking around with us during the course of a day, making merriment and tom foolery, that would be really funny.

Twelfth Night- Questions

1. How does Orsino come to know of the Lady Olivia?

2. How Viola come to hear about Orsino and Olivia?

3. Why does Olivia choose not to see people for seven years, because of her brother's death?

4. How does Viola fall in love with Orsino so quickly?

5. Why does Olivia have a fool?

6. How does Olivia fall so quickly in love with Viola(Cesario)?

Revise or not revise or maybe over revise?

When I approach the end of my writing piece, I look at it as a rough draft, my thoughts written down the way I was thinking about it at the time. I tend to think faster than the fingers type so I check to make sure that it isn't a typo disaster. I re-read my writing out loud which helps me to hear what the piece sounds like, the pace the tone. While I write I tend to be speaking to someone in the room a conversation of sorts. I then go back and make the writing more colorful, adding flair and fun. I want to make sure it all makes sense and is interesting. I check to make sure that my sentence doesn't run on forever and I take a breath. I also tend to make sure that all the content is included, did the point or thesis make sense, will the professor think it is good. I do tend to over revise, I sometimes need to just walk away and come back to it so that I don't change it so much that it becomes overdone.

It snowed last night and...

It snowed last night and as I looked out the window this morning, I was gleefully excited that it wasn’t enough that we had to shovel. I do love the way the snow makes the ground and objects appear clean, crisp and new, I love to take photos of this wonderful act of nature and all its beauty splendor. Snow makes the world quiet, calm and still, until…you have to work or travel in it! The act and sheer work of cleaning off my car becomes just that, work. Shoveling the sidewalk only to have the snow plows drive by and push back all the snow you just shoveled, becomes a tug of war, ultimately I always win, however at my back’s expense. Driving in it doesn't scare me, I personally can handle it, it is the other drivers who can't. Drivers behind the wheel as if they were in a metor shower, and the the ground is on fire. It isn't that difficult, take easy, pay attention, give your self extra time and space, but don't freak out about it and drive so slow that the car is about to stall or put your flashers on, while on the parkway in the right hand lane as if your tires were flat. If you don't feel comfortable about driving, stay home, but don't make it dangerous for others to manuver around you! Oh yes, but it looks so pretty on the tree tops, did I mention that?

I never enjoyed the snow much as a kid, except for the snow days from school and getting the day off. A bad experience with a sled led me to quickly end my career in the winter Olympics. As I hit the tree, due to lack experience with the steering mechanism, the tears flowing, I looked to my father to carry my sled back up the hill and to the trunk of the car. Ahhh snowball fights were fun, but only when I got to do the throwing and not the receiving. I hated it when you would get hit in the head, the snow crystals falling into you shirt, melting and running down your neck, yuck!! Worst than that was getting hit in the face, I wore glasses and when I would get hit, it would go into the lenses and make a ice wall between my eye and the lens, quite visible to the enemy. I hated when your gloves and mittens got wet and then your fingers would begin to freeze into fingerpops, if you didn’t have dry ones you were a goner for sure. Icicles are pretty, seeing the sun glistening, and a drop of water dripping from the tip is quite fun, but… I hate falling or slipping on ice, scraping ice, not a fan of ice skating (except I have always wanted to skate in Rockfeller Center and in Central Park). Sprinkling rock salt in hopes of ending the nightmarish frozen trap is somewhat like sprinkling salt on a slug, you hear the salt cracking and holes begin to melt through…just as the slug, attempts to squirm and shed the nasty chemical before he succumbs to its fate.

to be continued...

Battling against the nature of nature?

Michelle Nijhuis writes a thought provoking essay titled "To Take Wildness in Hand" to bring about the plight and story of the Torreya taxifolia or better known as Stinking cedar tree, found mostly in Florida, it's future unknown. The author tells the tale of a ancient tree, an ice-age relic possibly "left behind" after the last glacial retreat and very possibly better suited for cooler climates. Why is it's future unknown you may ask? experts are not exactly sure, possibly due to a mysterious disease, animals, drought,or stressful climate or perhaps maybe a combination of everything. Their numbers have been reduced to just a handful of rotting moss covered trunks, in riverside ravines it once had been so plentiful it could have been cut for Christmas trees.

Connie Barlow, a writer and naturalist takes on a personal mission to save the trees and move them north, to a cooler, less diseased climate and "since it couldn't move fast enough alone, she would move it herself". Her journey from when she first visited the Torreya State Park in 1999, taking a look at its hiddened treasure, the Torreya taxifolia up to the present, has been an uphill battle not only for the trees survival, but for other species of plants and animals as well. Discussion arose among scientists about the future of simply moving a species to a different climate for its survival, could it work? A graduate student would eventually coin a term for the idea in 2004 and assisted migration it would come to be known as. As you read about some of the other solutions conservationists have suggested, rather than move the trees north and the reasons why they will or won't work is interesting. The author also gives background information about the secluded area that has been ignored by chainsaws and hidden from time where the tree is slowly disappearing into extinction.

Activists of moving the tree up north are the same ones who believe it will work with other plant and species. Those who believe that it is a bad idea, calling it tinkering recalls one case in point, a case where Kudzu a vine like plant from China was planted by farmers in the 1950's. Suggested by the soil conversation in order to help with the irrigation of the soil down in the south of the US, the plant would eventually take over and was then listed as a pest weed in 1953. When speaking about the suggestion of assisted migration of the tree the manager of the perserves where the tree is barely holding on to it's existence, says "such efforts threaten to take attention and funding away from the work in the preserve and make an already bad situtation even worse".

I believe what the essay informs the reader about is yes, the future of an ancient tree and its road to extinction and those who wish to save it, but it tells of a much bigger and more important story between the lines. The story in my opinion is that the earth is changing, the climate is changing, species are created and species become extinct everyday. The world is not a perfect place, it makes mistakes, it re-invents itself and no matter what we attempt to do as humans, you can make matters worst or just spin in circles and do nothing and let nature take its course. The earth knows what it is doing, it is still evolving, growing, no matter how many scientists, naturalists, conservationist whatever "ists" you get in a room, you will not change what may not be changeable. When you sit and contemiplate the solutions, you come up with more questions, it is the nature of the beast. Perhaps the tiny tree has lived its life here on this planet and it just is its time...perhaps there is another tiny tree somewhere just born and not yet discovered. I say yes, try and help nature along, study it, marvel at it and be in awe, but don't be too disappointed if you can't change it, the zebras can't change his stripes nor the leopard it's spots even if you move them to a different place.

Questions in relation to Halpern's Essay

1. a) Data drawn from Sue Halpern's essay "Virtual Iraq":
- Posttraumatic Stress Disorder was officially recognized as a medical condition since 1980 when it entered the American Psychiatric Associations' Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders.
-Thirty-five active-duty and former members of the military in the spring of 2007 were part of the clinical trials to treat their psychological wounds using Virtual Iraq.
-According to a recent study by the RAND Corp., nearly 20 percent of Iraq and Afghanistan war veterans are suffering from PTSD or major depression.
-In 1997 researchers in Atlanta unveiled Virtual Vietnam.
-Ten combat veterans with long-term PTSD participated in a clinical trial of Virtual Iraq that had not responded to multiple interventions.
-JoAnn Difede began using virtual-reality exposure therapy with patients from the hospital's burn unit in the 1990's.
-February 2004 a prototype of Virtual Iraq was built on a laptop by Albert Rizzo and Jarrell Pair.

b) No, I did not access any of the data derived from this essay.


2. Yes, Halpern uses active verbs in her essay "Virtual Iraq" and in the following places:
-"...Boyd paused", pg 116 2nd para.
-"Instead he was haunted...", pg 117 2nd para
-"..."encouraged him to seek out pg 117 4th para
-"When Travis Boyd agreed to..." pg 117 5th para
-"...was over the reasearchers moved on." pg 119 1st para
-"...cruel to immerse a patient..." pg 119 4th para
-"...encountering it in three dimensions..." pg 125 3rd para

3. Yes,Halpern uses figuration in her essay Virtual Iraq and in the following places:
-"rooting out insurgents" pg. 116 1st para.
-"the enemy cut loose at us with everything they had," pg 116, 2nd para.
-"Bullets were exploding like firecrackers all around us" pg 116, 2nd para.
-"we'd have to light them up" pg 117, 1st para.
-"haunted by memories of Iraq" pg 117, 2nd para.
-"ground pounders" pg 118, 1st para.
-"drowning pool of painful memories" pg 119 4th para.
-"extinguishing the cues" pg 119 4th para.

4. Examples of portable wisdom from Sue Halpern's essay "Virtual Iraq" are
-"If you suddenly become afraid of the staircsae becauee you had to walk down twent-five flights of stairs to get out of the World Trade Center, the stairs went from being neutral to being negative," pg 119 4th para
-"I thought we should be on this so we don't have another Vietnam, with all these guys suffering from PTSD". pg 121 last line on bottom
-"The last one hundred years, we've studied psychology in the real world", "In the next hundred, we're going to study it in the virtual world". pg 125 2nd para
-"You never really get rid of PTSD, but you learn to live with it." pg 128 last para

Video Game Therapy?

"Virtual Iraq" the title led me to believe it was an essay on a travel cyber tour website of Iraq. Author Sue Halpern writes a totally different story of Iraq, one that I am grateful for its invention and those it helps. The use of Iraq War Veteran Travis Boyd(not his real name)and his battle with PTSD, post traumatic stress disorder grabs your attention and you gain a personal interest immediately in her essay. "Virtual Iraq" is a kind of cognitive-behavioral therapy consisting of a virtual computer-simulated three dimensional environment without using the traditional paper and pencil,sitting and talking. It brings the patient suffering from PTSD front to front with his fears, but in a controlled environment.

Not necessarily a new treatment, as it was used in 1997 20 years after Vietnam with 10 combat veterans with long-term PTSD, who didn't respond to traditional interventions as a clinical trial. It was called virtual Vietnam and all of the veterans showed significant signs of improvement, but it didn't catch on. Albert Rizzo a clinical psychologist had a hunch that if the Iraq war went on, veterans would come home with serious emotional problems. His affiliation with an Institute, designing virtual-reality systems to diagnose attention deficits in children and memory problems with adults led him to find a game called Full Spectrum Warrior. He would then find and call the programmer of Virtual Vietnam and ultimately together created a prototype and set up "Virtual Iraq" as a demo. They applied for money and got rejected, until an article written by Charles Hoge and his colleagues was published as a first assessment of mental-health problems emerging from service in Irag and Afghanistan. Catching the public and military by surprised Rizzo got a call, received the funds needed and the first patients were recruited to try it out.
Travis Boyd, a Iraq War veteran that the author interviews for her essay was a part of the Virtual Iraq clinical trial was hesitant at first, he did not want to talk to therapist's because he feared it would go on his record nor did he want to be considered weak and looked down upon. The feelings were echoed by other veterans and the mere fact that it was like a video game made it more appealing, which I believe is helpful for getting other veterans like Boyd, the help they need. The virtual world has it advantages for sure, the trained therapist can control the environment and add scenarios, effects when the patient is ready and at their pace. What they are doing is structured and systematic, treating the core fear, the avoidance and the anxiety augments the therapeutic process.

The patients work with the therapist in a very collaborative way, they are not overwhelmed. Together they can both set up a time frame to work through therapy, if something becomes to overwhelming the patient can stay in that area for any length of time they feel the need. The smells, sounds and visual effects are something I believe is important to re-visit in order to move past something as well as giving the therapists a bird's eye view of what their patient is actual seeing, hearing, and smelling for an intense insight.

Although this therapy may not work for everyone, the results for Travis Boyd was amazing. Boyd was able to sleep again without medications, was more relaxed, could joke around as well as talk about what happened to him, whereas he struggled desperately with these things before treatment. I feel that if this therapy helps at least half of the patients, it is a successful therapy tool that could one day be used with other mental disorders as an alternative for those who do not respond to traditional treatments.While I read this essay, I could not stop thinking about the movie "Tron" and how that movie sort of started this virtual world idea, did the producers ever think that it would help Travis Boyd and his battle with PTSD? In his words Travis says "You never really get rid of PTSD, but you learn to live with it". It is good to know that there is this amazing technology driven tool that helps him with that, he deserves to be happy and we are indebted to him for his sacrifice.